Patrons and Stowaways: Frerard

I don't think you really understand what's going on here. First of all, it's impossibly loud for a scene like this, yet you're running your mouth. Oblivious. I've always hated that about you; that makes one out of a thousand traits. There's really not much to hate about you. "Where do we go from here?" you're worried. It's kind of…sexy. Don't tell me you haven't always felt the sexual tension.

"We'll know when we get there." I stroked the sateen clinging to your thighs.

"What if I want to go back? What if I miss everything?" I could feel your head sink into my chest as I let out a sigh. "We just left. Packed up our lives and walked out the door, expecting anything but repercussion."

"It's a little late for that kind of deliberation. We have to keep going." I twist my neck awkwardly to kiss your face, my lips barely make contact; careful not to smear the black birds scattered like broken glass on your cheek. I tell you it'll be okay. But I know that's not a guarantee; but you're a grown man, older than I am as a matter-of-fact. We both know nothing is certain. I question your lack of adventure, and allow the inconstant rock of the train to ease us off into another dreamless sleep to carry into another flash of blackness and a rude, unwanted awakening.

I briefly wonder where this journey leads before realizing I don't mind. Location seems so frivolous at a time like this.

My eyes flutter to meet with my sudden consciousness. I don't know where we are, but the single window revealed a narrow, newborn sun's rays flying past in illegible blurs. Your hefty breathing reminds me you're with me, alleviating the discontentedness of the lonely.  I contort my body to wake you, gently. Your eyes are red, blank. Frightened. These are not your eyes; these sleepless, drooping eyes. I wonder if their cause is sadness or weariness. "Gerard," I whisper though we're alone. My voice doesn't seem to want to come out of hiding.

"Hmm?" Mumbling. But I didn't expect much else.

"We'll be fine. I think we're headed west, maybe toward the south. You've always liked warm weather." I was tracing large circles on your arms. Strictly to sooth. Maybe to put you to sleep, maybe to remind me there's a breathing creature peaceful beneath my touch.

I don't mind when you break away from me, honest. It just made me miss you a little, though you're right there. That's why I scowled. "Frank, what would you do if I told you," You scratched at your ebony head, the hair no longer done up; the hairspray makes it stick up in places I'm sure you'd hate if you could see it. I think it's cute. God, I didn't want to know how my hair must've looked. "That I can't stand this?"

I swallowed any conclusions before I jumped to them. Thank you for teaching me to do that, by the way. The Pink layered around your eyes make them look so green. Solid green bullets. "Why would you say that?"

"It's not fair that we ran away together nearly 24 hours ago and you still haven't kissed me. No one else is here but you and me." You've put your top hat on your lap, pulling the loose strings around the ribbon. You do that a lot, I've noticed. "I've just been trying to figure out why." You talk so nonchalantly. Like you didn't know it took all of your courage to ask such a thing. I wanted to tell you to stop pretending.

"I don't think you understand-"

"No, I really don't. I want to understand. I want to understand why I agreed to go with you. Or why we're dressed like this. I want to know why, twenty-four fucking hours later, I'm still cramped up here with you." You don't even look angry when you are. It's sweet. "But I know that I'm with you, and that's enough to know that I'll never have to fully understand anything we do for the rest of our lives. But I guess I got it all wrong, really. I thought this was your way of committing to me."  

You catch on quick. I thought we'd at least be in Vegas before you made me admit to any of this. "This is just how we work, Gee. I thought you knew that" A passionate sigh, "I thought you knew that I loved you. Waking you up was my proposal, dressing you in this costume was the 'I love you', and getting on this train was a promise that we'll be in this together as-well, whatever we are."

"I knew from the beginning that this whole 'just friends' thing wasn't going to work."

"Well, if you want me to kiss you here, I can't. A kiss for you needs to be…strategically spontaneous." I smirked as you cocked your eyebrow. You should show me that trick sometime.

That's why when you kissed me anyway, I was positive. Spontaneity looks good on you, you should wear it more often.

Whistles bluster, alerting the passengers to depart; both to the patrons and to the hidden stowaways. Both me and you. We have to jump now before it's too late; but I think we can actually sleep comfortably now that the air is less dense. Maybe even go back home. Maybe that's what we were running from in the first place; ourselves. But I finally convinced you to stay, to start over new. We were able to throw away the life we didn't have to. Though, I believe now that we had no other choice.

And like I said, it's a little late for those kinds of deliberations.